Governor Wolf issues statewide alcohol ban
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Today, Governor Wolf of Pennsylvania issued an indefinite ban on sales of alcohol throughout the commonwealth. Previously issuing the closure of state liquor stores, the current ban includes beer distributors, gas stations, and grocery store beer sales. The ban begins today at 9pm, and will continue until at least the end of the month, or until Sam, Gregg, and Vikki stop day drinking. The siblings were not available for comment.
April 1, 2020
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.